Two of tech's biggest dorks are in a heated rivalry. Gamestop is trying to purchase stuff it can’t afford. And all of your friends are being fired (you’re probably next). 

Anyway, let's get into it.

Musk Vs Altman trial begins

keep calm and trust in sam altman (part 2)

Elon Musk has finally taken the stand. He’s accusing OpenAI of swindling him out of $38MM. Musk argues that he seeded the company and helped found it as a non-profit for the benefit of society. 

Musk’s original argument was that Altman is a massive dork and he doesn’t like him.

But apparently, being a dork isn’t against the law, so his lawyers have switched up the plan and are now basing the argument around the following:

What if every company could begin as a charity, receive tax-free donations, build an amazing product, then just pivot to being for-profit? That would delegitimize the entire basis of the US charity system.

Here’s the deal, though.

OpenAI is claiming that Musk was originally a proponent of the company becoming for-profit back in 2018 when he was still involved.

But now that he’s lost all control of the company, he’s throwing around this lawsuit to ruin their IPO and get a competitive advantage for his own company, xAI.

We’ll keep reporting on how this progresses.

Tune in next week for the next addition: Revenge of the Dorks

Gamestop makes an offer to buy eBay for $56B

On Sunday, GameStop announced its proposal to purchase the legendary internet marketplace eBay for a whopping $56B.

Although Wall Street's Bets traders are likely excited, many analysts are incredibly skeptical about the practicality of the deal.

As of writing this, GameStop’s market cap is $10.55B, literally less than 4x less than eBay’s, which sits at $47B. That’s not exactly an insignificant gap…

Their offer is made up of 50% cash and 50% GameStop common stock. Considering the fact that 50% in cash is $28B, they’re going to have to leverage a massive amount of debt financing.

According to our sources, somewhere in Tennessee, Dave Ramsey has his arms crossed and is shaking his head.

GameStop’s CEO Ryan Cohen argues that eBay spends far too much money on sales and marketing but has the potential to rival Amazon in the consumer retail space. He explains that if they were to merge, eBay could leverage GameStop’s 1600 store locations as “a national network for authentication, intake, fulfilment, and live commerce.”.

Tech layoffs affect over 120k people and counting

It’s spring cleaning time, and tech companies are wasting no time clearing out their closets.

Since the beginning of the year, nearly 120,000 people have been let go. Almost 50,000 of which happened in March alone.

As you may recall from our last newsletter, Oracle made up nearly 30,000 of the layoffs in March. Both Dell and Meta were right behind them, who both let 10% of their staff go, nearly 11,000 and 8,000 people, respectively.

The common theme here, AI is coming for our jobs.

The truth is AI costs a lot. Like a lot A LOT. Sure, you may think you spend a lot on ChatGPT and Claude. But the big dogs are spending more money than most nations.

Meta, Alphabet, Amazon, and Microsoft are expected to spend $700B in capex ALONE.

They spent $400B in 2025. That's a 77% increase in just a year.

And yeah, that's total capex. So that budget is going to new office chairs and rent too. But you better believe that a massive portion of the $300B increase is furnishing Jensen Huang with a sick new Lizard skin coat.

This Week In Tech

• Anthropic and SpaceX partner to massively increase Claude usage limits (Anthropic)

• DeepSeek reportedly seeking funding at up to $50B valuation (RT)

• AI chip shortages are starting to hit consumers’ wallets (TG)

• Microsoft is offering buyouts to 7% of its staff (CNBC)

• To the surprise of no one, Google's annual I/O conference will focus on AI (CNET)

• SpaceX is looking to invest $55B in a state-of-the-art semiconductor facility (X)

• The death of middle market managers is coming… (BI)

• Data center electricians earn $280,000 (X)

• Amazon data centers facing months of repairs after Iranian drone strikes (YF)

• Nvidia, and PulteGroup are partnering with Span to install in-home mini data centers. (inc.)

• A16Z Crypto secures $2.2B in funding for its fifth venture fund (Fortune)

• Kalshi raises an additional $1B valuing them at $22B (Kalshi)

Meanwhile… 

• True Anomaly, Space technology startup ($650M @ $2.2B)

• Ineffable Intelligence, AI superintelligence ($1.1B @ $5.1B)

• Sierra, AI customer service agents ($950M @ $15.8B)

• Panthalassa, AI ocean infrastructure ($140M @ $1B)

• Blitzy, Autonomous software development ($200M @ $1.4B)

• Corgi, AI-native full-stack insurance platform for startups ($160M @ $1.3B)

• Astranis, High-orbit satellite / GEO spacecraft manufacturer ($450M @ $2.8B)

Reply and Let us know what you thought of today's issue.

Until then.

Thanks for reading. We'll be back next Friday with more proof that nobody knows what they're doing.

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